2025年11月的一天
今天是普普通通的一个周六，也是这个月的一次记录。上一次记录已经是 7 个月之前 了。
生活滚滚向前，我也一天天地混着过。有时候过得挺舒服，有时候又担惊受怕。渐渐发现，自己最害怕的并不是死亡——我可以接受随时死去——反而是分离焦虑。和我最爱的猫猫哪怕只是分开一会儿，都会非常想她。
早上起床特意定了个闹钟，因为工作上的一个任务终于部署到 生产环境（prod） 了，而今天早上就要看结果是否成功。如果失败了，就得立刻想解决方案。没想到竟然成功了，还好还好，一整天的心情一下子都变好了。感觉终于可以放心大胆地去做别的事情了。
想要的东西太多了：
- 想享受生活
- 想有副业
- 想工作升职
- 又想早点退休
但真正付诸行动的时候却很少。
An Ordinary Day · Journal Entry
Today is just an ordinary Saturday, and also this month’s entry. The last time I wrote was seven months ago.
Life keeps moving forward, and I’ve been drifting along day by day. Sometimes it feels comfortable; other times I live in constant worry. I’ve realized that what I fear most isn’t my own death—I can accept dying at any time—but separation anxiety. Being apart from my beloved cat even for a short while makes me miss her terribly.
I set an alarm this morning because a task at work was finally deployed to production (prod), and today was the moment to see whether it succeeded. If it failed, I would have had to think about how to fix it immediately. Unexpectedly, it worked. What a relief. My mood instantly lifted for the entire day, and I finally felt free to move on and focus on other things without worry.
I want too many things:
- To enjoy life
- To build a side business
- To get promoted at work
- To retire early
But when it comes to actually doing these things, I rarely take action.